Emma Kate is officially here!!

Wow, so I started this post like 1o times. Once at 20 weeks right when we found out we were having a little girl, then at 28 weeks, then at 35 weeks, then finally at 37 weeks when I officially became full-term. Needless to say I never finished any of those posts for one reason or another. It's so crazy to think how everything in your life changes so much in one short week! So I will give a little bit of a back story for the last 2 weeks of craziness including the arrival of our little Miss Emma Kate!

 

On July 10 I went to my normal doctor's appointment and everything looked great, but I did have an elevated blood pressure. Since everything looked great, we thought it was due to nerves since my bp has been completely normal during the entire pregnancy (thank God!). I do have chronic hypertension so the doctor told me to keep a close check on it and call if it continued to increase. The following Tuesday, July 15, I checked my bp and it was really high so I called the doctor's office and the doctor on call (since mine was on vacation that week) wanted me to come in. So off to the doctor I go. I spent the next 2 days in and out of triage in labor and delivery being monitored and poked and on bed-rest when at home. Which for those of you who know me well, knows how impossible this was for me!! That Thursday, July 17, we went in for our normal appointment. My blood pressure was really high, and the doctor ordered another ultrasound to see how the baby was developing (AKA if we have to take the baby now, how big will she be). She was estimated to be 6 lb. 10 oz. which made both of us feel better, BUT she had turned and was now breech. Erik and I then headed back up to triage for more blood work and monitoring. This all started at 2 PM. At 7 PM, I asked for food, and I was told "you probably shouldn't eat." Then . . .  they took my ice chips away! I had a moment of pure panic, becuase I've been around hospitals enough to know that they were thinking I was having her that night. I just wanted my doctor there, and I wanted a little more time to prepare. No matter how many months you have, the thought of having her under those circumstances scared me to death. Thank goodness, blood work came back great, and we were allowed to go home. Erik and I went back on Saturday for more monitoring. Everything looked great once again (other than high blood pressure), and I was allowed to go home and instructed to come back on Monday morning (July 21) at 9AM to finally see my doctor!

 

Erik asked on Monday morning if we should take our bags. My exact words were "there is no way Dr. Collins will do anything today, we will at least get to come home tonight and be able to pack." Little did I know in 4 short hours I would officially be a mommy. Once Dr. Collins saw my blood pressure, she sent me back up to triage for monitoring and told me before I left that she could take her that day if we needed to. Once I got up to triage the nurse came in and said she was going to go ahead and set my IV so she could draw blood because the doctor indicated I would probably be delivering that day. Panic set in for a few short minutes, but Erik was so calm and collected during the entire event which always helps me stay much calmer! About noon, Dr. Collins poked her head in and said blood work looked good, but the risk of waiting and letting my blood pressure continue to go up was of course stroke or seizure for me. She would prefer to go ahead and take her since she was full-term and appeared to be a good size. She went to find the anesthesiologist to find out about how long. Once again, I'm thinking I have a few hours. She came back in to tell us less than an hour. The next hour of my life is still a whirlwind of signing papers, talking to this nurse, that nurse, the anesthesiologist, seeing my mom (thank goodness I got to see her before they rolled me back), and then ultimately telling my husband goodbye around 12:40 outside the doors to the OR. I have had surgery before but never a spinal and never awake for it. So the next few minutes were a little crazy scary. My nurse, Robin at WRMC, was beyond amazing! By that time they had started and then I heard Dr. Collins say we need dad in here now. So here comes Erik and at 1:05 PM on July 21 Emma Katherine Tuft made us the happiest we have ever been. That first cry is indescribable!! Then they brought her over and placed her on my chest for a short while. Finally, her and Erik left for them to clean her up a little more and so he could show her off in the nursery. They finished with me and off to recovery. After about 20 minutes, they let him and Emma Kate come back to recovery to hang out with me and for me to feed her. I honestly can't say enough about how wonderful everyone and the experience at Washington Regional in Fayetteville. They truly put patients first, and they made our experience of having our first child so much more special.

 

Finally I was allowed to return to the room to greet family and wait for our little bundle of joy to get bathed and returned to us.

 

We spent the next 2 nights in the hospital. Dr. Collins gave me the option to go home on Wednesday, and I jumped at the opportunity! I was so ready just to get home and see the dogs, sleep in my bed and start our life as a family of 5 (yes, I still love my dogs!!).

 

We have been so blessed with so many well wishes, visitors and family! Things have been moving along at home, and we are getting adjusted to our new and even better life with Miss Emma Katherine! They aren't joking about life changing forever. The feelings and love I have for this little baby is like nothing I've ever experienced before!! We look forward to sharing her with the world in the upcoming weeks and years! 

 

 

Dear Emma Katherine,

 

You truly can't understand the love I have in my heart for you until you experience motherhood for yourself. I remember my mother trying to explain this to me. We prayed for you for so many years and had all but given up. We had come to terms with us never having a child of our own which makes you all the more special. You are truly our little miracle. You are going to be my little firecracker. You will test me and push me to my limits, but no matter what, I will always love you more than you will ever know or comprehend. I can't wait to watch you grow into the amazing young lady I know you will become. But please do it slowly! Your daddy and I are truly the luckiest that God chose us to be your parents. Don't ever forget how much we love you, and we will always be here for you! 

Second Trimester Excitement!

I officially started my second trimester about 4 weeks ago, but for most of you, you know what I do for a living, and you know why it's been really hard to update the blog during this time of year! I am officially 17 weeks, and other than being really tired (which is always true for the first of March), I feel really good. I have even felt the baby kick a few times. It is still really unreal! Not much exciting is going on in the Tuft household right now other than me working, Erik waiting patiently for warmer weather so he can play golf, and the dogs being lazy as usual! 

I officially have about 3 weeks left of busy season, and I couldn't be more excited and nervous! This will be the first year in 10 years that I have been on vacation for Spring Break! I have some really big plans . . .  waking up, eating, cleaning a little and sleeping a lot! I am going to try to make a trip to Tulsa one day and do some shopping for Baby Tuft which will officially have a name as of March 19 when we find out if it is a boy or a girl. Yes, I am very excited about that also, but as of right now, I'm trying to focus on getting wrapped up with busy season, then I get to get more excited about having a baby in 5.5 months. 

I will include my obligatory baby bump pictures which Erik has been bugging me about. I keep forgetting to take them and really until about 3 days ago you wouldn't have known I was pregnant! But I woke up Thursday morning, and I have a definitive bump now so that's kinda of exciting. The only thing not exciting about that is that I have 3 more weeks before I can go to Tulsa to shop for maternity clothes. I told Erik I might quit my job after I have the baby and design maternity clothes for younger professionals! The clothes are AWFUL! I am not a "bow" girl, and EVERYTHING has a bow around the belly area. Not everyone out there wants a bow around their belly. It's going to be challenging. I'm very ready for warmer weather so I can just wear sundresses with a jacket to work and flip-flops the rest of the time! 

There aren't many details to share about the pregnancy other than waiting patiently for boy or girl determination! I do feel better, but I still am not very hungry. I shouldn't complain too much I guess. Food just doesn't sound great at this point. I did make a peach cobbler today, because I have been craving it for like 2 weeks! Hopefully next update will have some more interesting details!! 

Now on to the photos! 

Me at 7 weeks

Me at 13 weeks

Me at 17 weeks (you can officially see a bump!)

I still have not mastered the art of taking the mirror selfie! Notice the really interesting facial expressions. I concentrate very hard. I need to start having Erik take these so I can focus on smiling! :) 

"Erik . . . I think we're pregnant!"

So I had imagined this moment in my daydreams for the past 2.5 years of how I would tell my husband that we were expecting our first child. For those of you who don't know us that well, I had always said kids were a maybe. My husband on the other hand would have a house full of them. So for the big reveal (as I had it planned) I purchased these really adorable doggy t-shirts to put on the girls. I was going to cook one of his favorite meals and be waiting at the door with the dogs, and it was going to be perfect. This was approximately 2 years ago. After the heartache of 2 years of trying to get pregnant, watching all of our friends including so many of our acquintances via facebook get pregnant, 3 failed attempts at artificial insemination, my well laid plans just didn't seem relevant anymore. We had essentially given up. We were both ok with this choice. Honestly I had come to grips with the reality of it all sooner than my husband. I never realized how badly I wanted to have a child until someone told me it was going to be this hard. So I stopped taking the prenatal vitamins, stopped taking the fertility drugs, upped my insurance to a higher deductible plan (to save money on a monthly basis), and we had started the adoption process as I outlined on here just a few short months ago. We were super excited about what was in store for our family. We knew that God was in control, and somewhere out there a woman was going to see us as the perfect fit for her child. And all would be perfect in the world...

Then Sunday December 8, our world was literally turned upside down in the most amazing way possible! I had just returned from Orlando from a work trip where I had a lot of fun (if you know what I mean . . . drinking and roller coasters sort of fun!). I wasn't feeling particularly well that whole weekend after I returned, but at first, I chalked it up to traveling and the fact I had returned from 80 degree weather to the snowpocalypse that was in Northwest Arkansas. Beth (my "twin" sister) had texted me while I was in Orlando and told me she had a dream that I was pregnant, but I kept telling myself there was absolutely no way. I had taken so many pregnancy tests to only see the one lonely pink line, I was scared out of my mind to let my hopes get up. But on that Sunday night, I decided to prove myself right (that I wasn't pregnant), and I would take a test. I didn't tell Erik I was doing it because I always felt bad when he would get excited. I would do this on my own, there would be one pink line and all would return to normal. So I did it. I waited about 2 minutes because patience isn't my strong suit and I looked. There was the solid pink line . . .  but right beside . . . could it be? REALLY? Was I really seeing what I thought I was seeing. Don't get me wrong it was faint, very faint, but I could have sworn there was a second pink line. I pull out the instructions and it indicated any second pink line means a positive pregnancy test. So instead of going with my well laid plans as discussed above, I go running into the living room and yell "Erik . . .  I think we're pregnant." Four pregnancy tests later we felt certain that we really were pregnant, and then a trip to the doctor confirmed. Two agonizing weeks later we went for our first ultrasound. I didn't want to let everyone know how insanely nervous I was. I had all the symptoms, and I kept telling myself everything had to be fine, but until you see that baby and the beating heart, you worry. Even after, you worry. I know this is what people talk about no matter how old your kids are, you worry about them. 

So now I'm officially 8 weeks. I won't say it's been an easy couple of weeks since finding out. I have determined that a man had to coin the term "morning sickness" because apparently he saw his wife sick in the morning and assumed that was it. It's an all day sickness that only goes away when I'm sleeping so I'm counting down to the blessed second trimester for some relief. Other than that and being insanely tired all the time, I really can't complain. Erik and I got really sick this past weekend. Just a nasty cold, but enough to make us both really lazy. So far food wise, I'm not eating a whole lot. Fruit and Mexican food is my go-to right now. Chicken is about the only meat that I can eat. Work is getting crazy which is worrying me since I'm beyond tired and nauseous all the time. It should make for a very interesting January. 

I can't thank everyone enough for their prayers and thoughts over the past few months. We are beyond blessed with amazing friends and family. We look forward to sharing this next adventure with each of you!